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Give Attention, Not Just Time As a business owner and father of five rambunctious children, I've often struggled with the goal of setting aside time for each of my kids, (as if successful parenting were only that simple.) Over the past few years I've noticed though that our kids don't really want our time... they want our attention. And believe me, time is much easier to give. Attention requires being in the moment, without a running agenda in the brain, fully available for what that moments holds. It's about hearing vs. listening and sensing who in the bunch needs to be tuned in when you feel like tuning out. If you recall your own childhood, you might find that some of the most significant moments with your own father were ones that seemed outwardly insignificant, almost ordinary. It probably wasn't a huge birthday gift, but simpler, more affirming gestures -- a trip with just him to get doughnuts, help with your volcano science project, holding a funeral for one of your pets. What children crave most is the one thing we find so hard to give, our very presence. It seems such an inadequate gift, so invisible and intangible. But it's the one that lasts a lifetime. On this Father's Day the greatest thing you can ever give your family is simply you. And that will always be more than enough.
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Top 10 Reasons to Journal
by Joyce Moseley Pierce
Send Feedback to Joyce Moseley Pierce
keeping a journal and blogging
More Details about keeping a journal and blogging here.
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I have been a faithful journal keeper since about 1980. I started out in 1978 by writing my thoughts in a steno notebook. As I learned how to put more expression in my thoughts, I moved on to a spiral notebook. I've tried journals with lined paper and lined loose leaf paper to put in my own three-ring notebooks, but because I am much faster at typing than writing, I now keep my journal on the computer. In years past I have typed the pages and printed them out, but in 2002, I typed my thoughts and just saved them on a CD. It takes up a lot less room and also allows me to have a password to protect my thoughts. In 2007, consider using a blog as your journal. I use Yahoo 360 for my personal blog and give access to family and friends. If you want to connect with new people, consider www.myspace.com or www.blogspot.com for recording your thoughts. It doesn't really matter how you record your thoughts. The important thing is that you do record them. For me, once I record my feelings and events, I can lay them aside and move on. Reasons for keeping a journal: 1. Record your own thoughts. Write about the things that touch your heart. Write about your activities. Write about your frustrations; your heartaches. It helps you see how you've spent your time. 2. Write about what your kids and grandkids do. My daughters have come to me and asked things about their own children. For instance, "Do you remember the word Chris used to say for 'french fries'?" Record those tender moments with them that touched your heart. 3. Relieve stress. When you're angry or confused, just let the words flow and get it all out of your system. It will help you both physically and mentally. 4. Help in analyzing situations. If you can write honestly, you'll find that you lose yourself in your writing. You may find additional meaning to the things you say or do. 5. Record facts. This is helpful if you ever need to go back and remember something important. You may even find it helpful if you have to prove something to someone. The other day I was trying to remember the name of a hotel in Dallas where we had stayed. When all else failed, I got my journal out, looked up the date we were there, and found it. "I'm here at the Harvey Hotel in Dallas on LBJ Freeway and Coit." When I shared this with my friend, she said, "Did you happen to write the phone number?" 6. Record events. Sometimes it seems that we don't always remember things the way they really happened. Not only do I forget the details, but sometimes my husband, or other family members just remember them in different ways. We may discuss it for awhile and try to figure out the "truth," but in the end, my journal is the final word because it is the only record! 7. Record feelings. On one of our recent wedding anniversaries. I shared my journal entry for another special anniversary several years ago. Some of the activities of that day that had been forgotten were brought back to the present and it touched both of our hearts. It's so easy to forget those good feelings when you're going through trials, so if you have a reference that can help you remember, it can keep you focused. 8. Set an example for your children. Teach them early to record their thoughts and activities through pictures and writing. I have a five year old granddaughter who gets up every morning and writes. Her level of reading is limited, but she's going through a wonderful exercise that will prepare her when she's ready to start recording. 9. Explore your talents. Let your feelings flow without critiquing the way you write them. Just pour out your heart and you'll be amazed at how your writing abilities will increase. They say people who read are much better spellers. I also believe that journaling will help improve your ability to write and communicate in general. 10. For posterity. Leave a record for your children, and don't sugar-coat it. Let them know how you felt about being a parent, what was important to you, what things have special meaning in your life. Show them how you dealt with the trials in your life. If you failed at something, let them know what you learned from that experience. There are many advantages and reasons for keeping a journal. If you're not currently writing about your life, consider starting right now. It's the beginning of a new year, and in some cases the beginning of a new life. Write about it now, while it's fresh, and you will find that it will give you, and your posterity, a better insight on who you are. Copyright 2008. Joyce is a freelance writer and owner of Emerson Publications. She's a contributing author to the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. Visit
Visit http://www.emersonpublications.comto read more of
Joyce's stories, to subscribe to the Family First
newsletter, to learn how to protect your family in your absence, or discover ways to make money at home. This site is dedicated to helping others create family unity in many different ways.
Contact the Author
Joyce Moseley Pierce
Family Preparedness
joyce@emersonpublications.com
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Keywords: journal, blog, blogging, record, family, health, history, perfect, parents, childern, child, posterity
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