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Who Is The You That You're Being?by Nancy Gerber Send Feedback to Nancy Gerber Meeting someone new is challenging!More Details about Meeting someone new is challenging! here.
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We usually act on beliefs and values that originate with family; others come from educational experiences, religious institutions, jobs, friends, the media or social groups. Most of the time, we've absorbed these viewpoints unconsciously during our life experiences, and make decisions and take actions without a real awareness of the underlying principles that motivate these choices and behaviors. How can we know who we are without examining these building blocks and deliberately choosing the ones that make sense for us? There are so many influences and needs that distract us from staying on course and remaining true to ourselves. If we're lonely, we may compromise just to have some company. If the bills have piled up, it's so tempting to broaden our boundaries a little to embrace a wider range of earning activities. The ever increasing overload of ideas and information muddies the waters even further. And, even when we have a pretty clear understanding of who we are and what we believe and value, our own self-defeating habits and attitudes get in the way. I shared with dear old friend today, someone I know for over thirty years, that I've become aware that I'm holding back in an important aspect of my life, that I've been resisting stepping up to my potential in this area for a very long time. 'You, holding back?' my friend laughed. 'I find that hard to believe.' I realized that he has always experienced me as someone who generally plays full out, takes risks and faces up to most challenges. This really brought home how out of synch I am in this area, in spite of my best intentions and strong desires. What I've begun to do is look at my most common behaviors that are characteristic of who I am generally, and think about how I can implement them in this challenging portion of my life. At the top of a page, I've written: 'I'm a person who....', and have begun to jot down phrases such as, 'meets challenges head on', 'confronts the truth and corrects mistakes' and 'welcomes and embraces change'. Perhaps keeping this list of my chosen values and behaviors visible daily will remind me of my true identity and help me move forward. What kind of person are you?
For over 30 years Nancy Gerber, “YOUR Connection Magician”, has coached and educated thousands of people worldwide on how to improve their communication and deepen their relationships with others -- and themselves. Nancy specializes in showing us how, in this age of increasingly impersonal electronic communication, we can IMMEDIATELY deepen our human connections and build more successful relationships with ourselves, the people around us and our larger community. Sign up for Nancy’s popular FREE e-zine Thoughts For A Thursday (which has been published weekly since February 2001). Learn more about her learning tools, programs and services at http://www.sstones.com
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