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A Little Bite of Bread - Depressed?
by Linda Worner
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Fighting depression

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Over the last couple of months, I have been in a battle that seemed could not be won. Depressed, down on life and on myself one day and the next day getting back up to try again to pull myself out of the pit. I have finally gotten so tired of the up and down and really started crying to out to God. My cries are cries of desperation, Lord, where are you? Lord, what is wrong with me that I can not seem to fight off this depression and on and on the cries go. I have found Psalms 107 which spoke about the solution to my problem and the answer He has been trying to give me. I have read it over and over again and I am so excited about the words in it. Kind of ashamed that it has taken me so long, but that is okay, I found it! It starts out in verse one 1 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever. (Forever means He never quits on me)2 Has the LORD redeemed you? Then speak out! Tell others he has redeemed you from your enemies. We are commanded to speak out about our victories, not think and talk about how we are trapped with no way out. The last few months, all I have thought about is how I seem to be trapped and there seems to be no way out. Change starts to take place and very quickly things go bad again in my own mind. I am to talk about the victories, that God has already given me. The truth is, there is victory in all of the situations that I face because God says, He has fought every battle for me, I just have to go in and take possession of the land! It goes on with 6 "LORD, help!" they cried in their trouble, and he rescued them from their distress. (When I cry out, He hears me and rescues me) He led them straight to safety, to a city where they could live. 8 Let them praise the LORD for his great love and for the wonderful things he has done for them. (What Jesus did on the Cross is more than enough) 9 For he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things. 10 Some sat in darkness and deepest gloom, imprisoned in iron chains of misery. (this is depression) 11 They rebelled against the words of God, scorning the counsel of the Most High. (Whenever I get down, the first thing I do is neglect the time I need in the word)13 "LORD, help!" they cried in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress. 14 He led them from the darkness and deepest gloom; he snapped their chains. 15 Let them praise the LORD for his great love and for the wonderful things he has done for them. 16 For he broke down their prison gates of bronze; he cut apart their bars of iron.

In personal conflicts with another person, I have been very stubborn in many ways, refusing to let the other people get the best of me. When these personal conflicts finally came to a point of either get it right or we are no more, I realized just how stubborn I have been. There are many scriptures that talk about how bad the stubborn, hard hearted person is and how God hates that. This opened to door to more depression, look, you are exactly what God hates. You will never pull out of this mess. and you will never measure up to what God wants you to be. One lie after the other, I let the enemy feed me and I fell into the darkness once again. Tonight though, God showed me, that one of the good qualities about me is the stubborn streak only it is misplaced and misused sometimes. The definition of stubborn is 1 a (1): unreasonably or perversely unyielding : mulish (2): justifiably unyielding : resolute b: suggestive or typical of a strong stubborn nature 2: performed or carried on in an unyielding, obstinate, or persistent manner. The definition of persistent is 1 : existing for a long or longer than usual time or continuously: He reminded me of a time, I went on a job interview. I needed a second job to catch up on my bills. This job was 12 hours a day, night shift for 7 p.m. to 7 a.m. You worked 4 days a week on this schedule and had three days off. I asked the guy, can I work this job and keep my other job for a while? I need the double income. The man laughed at me and told me it was not possible to do this work, hard physical labor, on your feet for 12 hours and work another job too. I convinced him to allow me to try it and out of spite, I worked both full times jobs for over 6 months. When they made night checks, they never found me sitting, sleeping or goofing off, they always found me on my feet, walking my hoses and doing what I was paid to do. This was a stubbornness that turned into a very good job that was training ground for bigger things later on. The Lord showed me that stubbornness is good if it is stubbornness in prayer and in belief in His ability and faith in His word. Stubbornness or persistence in doing what His word commands to win each and every battle through love and through forgiveness and through perseverance in prayer. We are told in Luke 21:36 Watch therefore, and pray always that you may be counted worthy to escape all these things that will come to pass, and to stand before the Son of Man." and in Ephesians 6:18 praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints-- This is the kind of stubbornness that pleases God and opens the door for victory in any battle that we face. Praying today, that as you go through your struggles, that you are able to learn a lesson from my experience. Never give up on the word of God. Search it for the words that apply to the situation and then get stubborn, this is what the word says about this, this is the final word on this subject, no turning back, no giving in, the truth of the word of God is the truth of my life, my actions and my thoughts. Be persistent and stubborn in prayer, praying not only for yourself, but for others as well and then last but not least, go and tell the world, God has done this for you. Let your light so shine before men!

Iam passionate about the love of Jesus and the things that He has done in my life and I am so excited that I have to share with the world what He has done, not only in my life, but in others lives as well.

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Linda Worner

linda.worner@yahoo.com
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